God In My Weakness

EVERYTHING
God in my living
There in my breathing
God in my waking

God in my sleeping
God in my resting
There in my working
God in my thinking
God in my speaking
Be my everything
Be my everything
Be my everything
Be my everything
God in my hoping
There in my dreaming
God in my wathcing
God in my waiting
God in my laughing
There in my weeping
God in my hurting
God in my healing
Christ in me
Christ in me
Christ in me the hope of glory
You are everything
Christ in me
Christ in me
Christ in me the hope of glory
Be my everything
You are everything
Jesus, Everything


Tim Hughes Holding Nothing Back Album - Song "Be My Everything"

How often have I tried to move forward in my own feeble power and ended up a heap on the floor? You think you can do this thing called life and you simply are not up to the task. I give up and give in. Just then God reaches down with His loving hands and lifts me up so I can walk again. He walks me through the barriers of life - in His limitless strength. That's the promise He gives to you to me. Whatever you may be facing today , don't give up , don't give in. Wait for those marvelous, loving hands to cover your own-and be ready to walk with delight as He walks with you. 

Monday Morning Thoughts

"You weren't an accident. You weren't mass produced. You aren't an assembly-line product. You were deliberately planned, specifically gifted, and lovingly positioned on the earth by the Master Craftsman." Max Lucado

 Forgive and give as if it were your last opportunity. Love like there's no tomorrow, and if tomorrow comes, love again.

 To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage. --Lao Tzu

 Where there is great love there are always miracles.-- Willa Cather

You can give without loving. But you cannot love without giving. -- Amy Carmichael

Okay so it's February and you are already overwhelmed by all the Valentines adds on TV.  I've heard it all before. "Don't need a special day to declare my love". Nope you don't . But anything to change the hectic pace of everyday run around and make you think about others outside your box is a good thing. I know I've been pondering love of sorts. And  just when I think I got it all figured out I screw up again. Sorry honey, I do tend to want my own way and after 31 years of marriage I still expect you to just KNOW what I need.
Seeing it was just my sons engagement I did get all mushy inside...ahhh...young love , like holding a newborn baby , nothing else in the world compares to it. And then thoughtful deep thinker pessimist that I am...life will change, reality will set in. And shame on me.
 Life happens, sorrows overwhelm us at times, but why is this love thing so hard to grasp and keep? WHY? Why is my heart sometimes more broken then mended? I must confess my focus is on my circumstances and not on the creator. My relationship must first be towards heaven and God, and then towards other people. Horizontal and then vertical. And when circumstances overwhelm me I need to remember I am loved. Always. At the cross. Today and forever. And I want you to know and remember you are loved always.

Know who you are

Loved By You
Paul Baloche and Lincoln Brewster

River flow from Your throne
From Your heart through my soul
Healing flood God of peace
Speak Your word and quiet me

I was made to be loved by You
To be loved by You to be loved by You
I was made to be loved by You
To be loved by You to be loved by You (Jesus)

Mercy rain fall on me
Hide me now beneath Your wings
Hold me close to Your side
For I am Yours and You are mine

Open up wide Your arms and my eyes
Take all I have and make it Yours
You've given Your life and now I'm alive
To worship you now forevermore

I was made to be loved by You
To be loved by You to be loved by You Jesus
I was made to be loved by You
To be loved by You to be loved by You Jesus
I was made to be loved by You
To be loved by You to be loved by You oh

I have been chosen by God.

I have been adopted in His family.
I am loved.

How sweet to hear these words.

If I am adopted , I have become a child; God is no longer my judge but my Father. D.L. Moody

Not Me

Wasn't gonna do it . No sir ree...is that even a word? No way , no how. But, there I was back at Jimmy Pattison Pavilion having an x-ray done. Seems my frozen shoulder ,which still keeps giving me trouble is not a frozen shoulder at all, but has stumped the new specialist. It's not the x-rays that were the problem It's not even stumping a new doctor, did the same thing to the new Chiropractor that I'm seeing. Or the physio therapist that's still working on my ankle. If you are counting that's three different doctors on one body at once, but who's counting? Feeling pretty fortunate that so many doctors are in line to help me. No , no its not those things. It's the pit in my stomach that opens up my memories. Every older gentlemen that sits in the waiting room is being scrutinised by me. Yup , I stalk them. What is there daughter like? He has my dads smile. And my heart does a leap and I plunge into conversations about why they are getting tests done. And I so want to hug them and tell them how lucky they are to be alive. Crazy huh! And sometimes in a weird way maybe its not so bad getting all these tests done. It gets me  chance to rub shoulders with older people. The people in there last stages of life who take time to smile back in a full waiting room and do not hide behind a cell phone. Such a time as this can sometimes be very lonely.
Thankful for:
1. Memories
2. My husband who takes care of me
3. Doctors who want to help, despite my unbelief
4. I really rocked the blue hospital gown at the x-ray clinic
5. A day to celebrate new love, congrats Mattias and Stacey-happy engagement
6. Fresh sheets and a clean house
7. Partying with friends

Thoughts For Today

“If prayer stands as the place where God and human beings meet, then I must learn about prayer. Most of my struggles in the Christian life circle around the same two themes: why God doesn't act the way we want God to, and why I don't act the way God wants me to. Prayer is the precise point where those themes converge.”
― Philip Yancey
Some days I question why my life must be they way it is. The other day I was with a friend and she asked me how life was going? I said okay. You know between kinda good and real honesty. And she said well life wouldn't be interesting if it was smooth sailing , now would it? My response naturally was well after years of choppy waters  smooth sailing sounds pretty good right now.
I like my life to be pain free wag that magical wand and show the world I got it together.

You have been chosen at this time in history in this precise place to do His work. Do not look to the right or to the left, trying to find answers in world philosophies or religions. Neither allow yourself to be deceived by those who say that you can meditate a certain way and be guaranteed to receive riches, even by substituting your 'god.' Satan is out to deceive, especially those who are saved. (Phil. 2: 8)
And this: You were chosen to sit at the King's right hand. You have favour with the King and, because of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross you do not have to fear instant death in His presence. NO! You can come boldly unto the throne of grace to obtain mercy and grace in time of need. (Heb. 4: 14 - 16).
And as I started to research this topic a little more I came to the conclusion that I am exactly at the point in life where God wants me to be. I have been chosen to walk this path and help my family in whatever capacity God has called me to. It is not my choice. I did not choose this path. But God choose it for me. He entrusted me to walk this life today in His presence . He will lead me, He will guide me. He will touch me with His hand and will never leave me or forsake me. He sees the bigger picture, and at times it is too much for me to handle. He is there. Always .Always.

So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the LORD your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you."Deuteronomy 31:6B

Too Weak

Oma I'm not Strong enough to go to Church. Isn't that just precious? I was babysitting our grand daughters and we were talking about attending Church while there parents were off on a cruise. Not strong enough to face a bunch of strangers telling me what's good for me and what God wants to do in my life.? Something wasn't resonating that cutely anymore.  And I started having flash backs into my past. At eleven saying good bye to my mother, not strong enough God can' t do it. Laying to rest two sisters in one year, not strong enough God can't do it. And I pulled back from God and those around me. The Church and all those lovely people that were just dying to tell me God had such bigger plans for my life. And then losing my step mom and dad within another year, and you know they lived a long life. They are at peace , yada, yada... We've all heard how good natured bible believing people know what is best for us. Nope defiantly not strong enough God. And yet God in His mercy just sat their and waited for my rantings to end and welcomed me back.  I didn't have to clean house before I came back. This morning in my devotional time I was convicted of my jealousy of others lives as I read about the prodigal son returning home. I was right in there with the son who said , not fair I've always been good. Why do you throw a party for my brother who did whatever he wanted to do and I never had a party? And I realised that we all have a unique walk in life. And at times we all experience that we are not strong enough. And that's when God waits with open arms and throws us a party. We blew it, we did our own thing, but there He is. Come on in the party awaits. I will be your strength.
"Be to me a rock of refuge, to which I may continually come" Psalm 71:3

It's A New Year

 Putting away the last few bulbs of Christmas 2013. It's been another tough year, sprinkled with fun.
Pulling open our devotional at Harrison Hot Springs left me excited with anticipation. What was God going to say to me, right now, right here among the tranquillity of this resort?
Hope is an Olive Leaf-Evidence of dry land after a flood. Proof to the dreamer that dreaming is worth the risk. Max Lucado.
My dear friend Max, always has meaning full words put to paper, feeding my ravenous appetite.
Hope that I had just about given up on this last year. And then the dove landed with a olive leaf in his mouth and bid me take. ...
Now the sun is setting , and the sky is darkening , and you look around and all you see is water. Water to the North, water to the South, water to the East, water to the West...
You know the feeling . You have stood where Noah stood. You've known your share of floods. Flooded by sorrow at the cemetery; anger at the disability in your body, guilty of not being able to shelter your child from life's storms. You've seen the flood water rise, and you've likely seen the sun set on your hopes as well. You've been on Noah's boat.
Oh yes I have. Fourth Christmas in a row, floods, torrential rain, indisputable sorrows, sea winds and waves rocking my Ark. I needed what Noah needed. A little hope. And that's all Noah received.
"When the dove returned to him in the evening , there it was a freshly plucked Olive Leaf"
Gen. 8:11.
The bird brought back a promise , hope of better times. Evidence of dry land to come after a flood. Proof to the dreamer that dreaming is worth the risk. I am a dreamer. I needed that Olive leaf.
Don't we all love the Olive leaves in our life? It appears the cancer may be remission. I can help with those fiances. We'll get through this together. Whats more don't we love the doves that bring them? When a wife of many years consoles the wife of a few months, when she tells her that conflicts come and all husbands are moody and these storms pass, you know what she is doing? She is giving an Olive leaf. Just like Jesus who extends grace, love and mercy to us to me. Grace and life, forgiveness of sin. Defeat of death. This is the hope he gives. He will never leave us or forsake us. To all the Noah's of the world , to all who search the horizon for a fleck of hope, He proclaims ,"Yes"! And He comes. He comes as a dove. He comes bearing fruit from a distant land, from our future home. He comes with a leaf of hope.  Don't think your Ark is too isolated ,your flood to wide. And that is what I needed to hear. "Love bears all things, believes all things, HOPES all things , endures all things"
 1 Cor. 13:4-7 .Love has hope in you. Love extends an olive leaf to the loved one and says , I have hope in you.

 So this first day of 2014 I have put my first "hope" item in my bottle of Joy. A picture of my friends who extend Olive Leaves to me. Who stand by me and walk with me so that the flood waters of life don't overtake me and drown me. Who love me despite my weakness or inability at times to show love back. Thank you my friends, thank you.